Let’s face it, we all want life to be sweet and good, even pomp and merry. But it’s not always so. Hence, in life, sometimes we find ourselves in a place where life has hit us hard in the stomach and brought us to our knees. When this happens, first, we need to reflect, and then employ a strategy that would help us get back up. It may take time, but we need to find that ‘thing’ that helps us drop our baggage of pain and hurt behind and move on again. For some, it is a strong willingness to achieve certain things in life. For others, it is simply purpose. By following these highlighted steps, you will find yourself in a place of greater comfort, sooner than you imagined.
Validate yourself: You need to validate yourself. No one else can. You can begin by acknowledging your own strength and successes. Everyone needs validation to feel accepted and understood. However, you may not always get that from people. You are the best person who can validate yourself, especially if people you expect around you don’t. Others around you may have their particular interests on matters. Their interests and opinions may not always coincide with yours. In such cases, having thought it through, you need to truly trust yourself enough to believe in your words and purpose.
Our anchor is and will always be Allah: Actually, this comes first. The only validation you require, aside yourself, is Allah. It is Allah whom we rely on as we scratch and claw our way through the understanding of events in our lives. Individually, we are worth something to the one who created us. He didn’t pu 9t each one of us on earth without a purpose. So, rely on Allah. ومن يتوكل على الله فهو حسبه . Quran 65: 3. Ultimately, humble yourself before Him. Surrender that future you are anxious about, He can raise you to a better place you didn’t imagine.
You are worth something to yourself: If you are worth something to Allah, you definitely are worth something to yourself. And in extension, to the world. You have a bigger purpose, bigger than your current situation. You owe yourself this. Focus your brainpower on that. Ask Allah to guide you. Your mind becomes clear to listen to His direction as you do this. With Allah’s guidance, you can turn pain and hurt into purpose. It cannot be overstated that whatever He has willed for us will happen. There are more good than bad in your life. While the current situation might seem to overpower you, things CAN ALWAYS be changed through prayer. Never lose hope. You do not have to understand everything immediately. Wisdom comes, but in bits.
Put the past where it belongs: You can’t achieve much without putting the past where it belongs - behind you. It shouldn’t have a place in your present nor in your future. Make your life about the future, because it really is. Strive consistently, because while we may set out to achieve something, we really would not accomplish it without being consistent. It takes a lot of effort to push the past behind us, especially when it is shrouded in pain and hurt. But here is why this step is important - if we do not make that effort, it will continue to hinder us. Hence, we will never achieve our true purpose. We will leave no space for the truly amazing stuff that is about to happen if we don’t create space by throwing out old stuff. We have to clear away the clutter so we can brightly see what next He has planned for us.
Achieving purpose: Little by little, as you walk through the journey of healing, you will begin to discern, more and more, what the real cause of the problem is. It will change the way you view your own life. You most likely have a bigger purpose beyond your current situation. Believe in that bigger purpose. Most of all, nothing happens unless you make a change. Even Allah doesn’t change our situation until we change what is in our own hearts. ان الله لا يغير ما بقوم حتى يغيروا ما بأنفسهم If for example, your pain stems from not getting the validation you expect from certain people around you, you need to first begin by choosing yourself. If you continue to let people put you down, then so be it; even Allah might not change your situation. But once you choose to be treated in the right way, you begin to make changes. Take little baby steps in your change. They will go a long way. And most of all, you have Allah as your help and guide.
While we all wish that we would live a life without pain, it isn’t always so. There are times we struggle in life in order to achieve purpose, and even power. Often, we always realize that turning to Allah is the true way to acquire calm and consequently, fulfill our true purpose. When life throws us lemons, we make... that’s right… lemonade. And I really do wish you a greater, happier life, from here on.
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