Have you heard the popular saying “women should start putting anti-age products from around their late 20s?” We women have been hearing this from elders and all our well-wishers. Though they may mean well it is tiresome and sometimes worrying when we are told about our appearance as a whole.
The Magazines like Vogue to the beauty and cosmetic market all tell women to start with their anti-aging products early or around their 30s.
If you go to the market to buy anything skincare or beauty related you can see a range of lines of products from almost every brand that is doing good in the market inciting customers to reduce, reverse ageing or have their ‘look younger/ be young’ vibe on their items.
Even though some may provide their promising glowing, tight skin, and lift wrinkles with their continuous use as they suggest, using the mix of right amount of formulated materials and acids may give you glowing and hydrated skin but is not guaranteed to reduce your fine lines and wrinkles, they are also not good for you financially. The creams and lotions are classified as cosmetics and not drugs by the FDA so they do not have to be scientifically or medically proven for effectiveness and safety, this is counter to what we assume about them being tested.
The beauty and cosmetic industry not only profits from our insecurities of being older and not looking as we used to be, it is instilling in us the belief that we are not good enough as we are. It tells us we will feel healthy enough when we look and feel younger than we are. Hence, a youthful look is equated to being healthy which is not true.
So, our obsession with being this healthy and youthful version of ourselves is a learned and practiced social behavior that needs to be unlearned.
We can take more examples than the ones in the skincare industry that tell us to look youthful and glowing at every age than we actually are. Women are told that we need to maintain our shape, size, fashion trends and more so we don’t look too old, and unattractive later in our lives.
If women choose to give birth, they are suggested to use a ton of tips and tricks so that they have to worry about their bodies changing drastically after birth and some months into it. When women choose to pull a human being out of themselves, they are celebrated for being new mothers and bringing a child into the world and yet they are warned and worried about how their body changes drastically if not maintained properly. It is total injustice that they are made to worry about their body shape and size when they're having hormonal, psychological, and emotional changes in themselves.
From the TED Talks
Ingrid Fetell Lee in her article talks about ageing and especially for women ‘ageing gracefully’ which involves having to look 3 to 5 years younger than you are without seeming to do anything to be so. She adds about ‘acting your age’ i.e wearing age-appropriate clothes, hair, and even age-appropriate activities. She discusses that ‘ageing gracefully’ is like walking a tightrope between a society that is youth-obsessed and a culture that says it's uncool to be desperate to have something they can’t have (to be young).
She tells that instead of being torn down between trying to be young and not seeming to try harder to be young, she decides to not see ageing as something to be conquered or defeated. She questions the audience why ageing cannot be something joyful. She finally explains 8 significant practical ideas to be more alive and celebrate growing older. Ingrid has given her talk in the TED Talk, the article shows. It is one to not miss.
At any age, we want to be enough
Here is my take on ageing. Change is inevitable and so are the changes in our bodies and mind. Though ageing is more than just looks and bodily change as mentioned above by Ingrid, here I will focus on appearance since we seem to be most bothered by that.
Talking on our looks, we don’t need to we disregard, avoid and make our bodily changes so uninvited. Why do you want to be trapped in your 20 or 25-year-old body if you’re in your 30s, 40’s, 50’s? Yes, your cheekbones may change, a line may appear every now and then and your body size or structure may change over time but I bet you don’t want to look back at all the years to realize that you spent most of it almost not accepting, loving, or embracing your own body.
Why do we need to try to reverse or stop the skin cycle and body processes and why should we carry that pressure of expectations when we can be truly graceful (not the one mentioned above by Ingrid), glowing in our mind and body as we make more healthy choices for ourselves?
I would like to embrace ageing, live gracefully being alive, and thrive in my wholeness, not lessen or reverse any part of me. Growing is beautiful and we should develop our minds to flourish in all ways than be scared of losing our youthful shape, glow, and appearance. Instead of tightly holding onto something that will eventually slip away why don’t we let ourselves just be as we are, being in gratitude for all life offers us and showers upon us?
Change looks so beautiful on each of us when we have the courage and willingness to look more forward than backward. We don't need to lament how our bodies changed or change naturally as we simply live and try to be better versions of ourselves in each stage of life.
When we understand this simple concept of developing our minds and facing ourselves unfiltered as human beings, we are no longer at war with our own bodies and mind.
We need to address that we exist and acknowledge that we don’t have to hide who we are. When we own all we are and who we are becoming like wearing a crown, we advance toward life with a new wave of enthusiasm and excitement of choosing healthier options for ourselves, leaving the toxicity the society once taught us, and finally being at peace.
We hope you aren’t afraid of growing but look forward to living.
What are your thoughts on ageing and embracing it? Tell us in the comments.
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