Finding that delicate balance between relaxation and productivity can be a never-ending battle in a world that never seems to stop, where hustle culture reigns supreme and success frequently rests on the sheer amount of hours we put in. As I sit here, longing for a nice nap to reignite my tired body and mind, I can't help but open my heart to you and express my inner turmoil. The guilt of wanting to sleep even when I'm exhausted is a burden I know many of you bear.
The Need for Rest
Our lives unfold in a world where we are constantly encouraged to keep pushing, maximize productivity, and fiercely chase our dreams. However, the harsh reality is that burnout is a silent opponent that can strike at any time. There are days when I am completely exhausted, both mentally and physically, from working so hard just to make ends meet. The never-ending stack of bills casts its shadow, and the constant need to keep grinding pounds down on us.
Sleep, in its purest essence, is an irrefutable human necessity. It's a place where our bodies and brains may heal, refuel, and regenerate. Even amid the never-ending struggle for survival, we must pay attention to the cries of our worn-out souls and give ourselves the rest we so urgently need. Therefore, I need you to know that self-care isn't a luxury; it's a lifeline, especially when the want to sleep as an escape from relentless tiredness overwhelms me.
The Guilt of Sleeping
When I think about sleeping for longer than what society considers proper for a diligent person, though, a perplexing dichotomy becomes clear. As guilt sets in, my goals are tainted by it. My mind is clouded with images of incomplete work, unpaid bills, and unrealized goals. It's a peculiar kind of guilt that makes me feel unworthy of rest and turns relaxation into an indulgence.
In a world that often promotes sleepless nights and the never-ending grind, admitting to the need for extended rest can be treated with judgment or self-criticism. I find myself second-guessing my worth, passion, and goals. It's almost as though society's standard for success has left me feeling inadequate simply for wanting to refill my spirit.
( Source- FreePik, October 15, 2023)
The Reality of Comparison
In an age where social media showcases curated glimpses into the lives of others, it's all too easy to fall prey to the dangerous trap of comparison. I watch others around me seemingly effortlessly handling multiple duties, attaining their aspirations, and relishing in the joys of life. It is, without a question, motivating, but it also serves as a constant reminder of the gap between their journeys and mine. The guilt tightens its grip as I measure myself against those who seem to have it all figured out.
Yet, it is critical to realize that each of our paths is profoundly individual. What works for one may not work for another. We each bear our unique battles, wrestle with our specific limitations, and showcase our distinctive strengths. Most importantly, we must remind ourselves that it's perfectly acceptable to take a step back, acknowledge our fatigue, and grant ourselves the bliss of rest without the weight of guilt.
( Source- FreePik, October 15, 2023)
The Power of Acceptance
Acceptance emerges as an incredible tool in our pursuit of balance. Recognizing that it is completely acceptable to rest, experience times of vulnerability, and prioritize our own well-being is a major step toward self-compassion. Admitting that we're tired is not a sign of weakness; it's a sign of self-awareness.
But there's another side to this conflict within me.When I do find that window of opportunity to sleep, my thoughts, my spiritual health, don't always allow me to rest peacefully. It's not always a good night's sleep that I desire, but rather a respite for my battered body. I close my eyes, but my dreams sometimes turn into nightmares, echoing with the relentless call to question why I sleep, how I could rest when there's so much unfinished in my life.
When my eyes require more blush than concealer, I recognize I overwork without resting. With a white skin tone, white or cream concealer no longer becomes strong enough to conceal my dark eye bags, but only my red burgundy lipstick applies over it with overloaded blush, red burgundy lips to make a fresh face with the cranky forehead in front of laptops as a productive person in the hustle life with fulfilling goals. It's exactly like my life. I realize that no longer normal things or any advice could cover my exhaustion. A therapist to talk to, or sleep to re-energize, could not cover up my conflict in the same way that concealer becomes ineffective in my renewed face. I once helped someone edit their work. I highlighted the errors in their product and asked them to fix it. They provided me another modified version, and I was disappointed that they did not correct the problem that I had noted. But then I realized they did; it's just that my brain isn't working fast enough right now to figure out which part of their earlier error is the updated one I wanted them to copy and paste into their production. It's such a mockery of my work that I can't tell which one is correct while it's right in front of me. My sleep conflict is a harsh comment to my body. Self-sleep shaming is worse than ever.
Though the world may constantly press us to strive, we must not lose sight of the fact that our worth extends far beyond our output. Our worth is not solely defined by our ability to labor nonstop. We are human beings who deserve to be loved, relieved, and fulfilled.
I invite you to do the same as I manage this fragile balance between the need for rest, the guilt that often shadows it, and the demanding voices within my own head. Allow yourself the compassion you so richly deserve. Recognize your limitations, give yourself the time you need to rekindle your soul, and understand that your battle is not unique to you. Your journey is distinct, and your well-being is as valuable as anyone else's.
With warmth, understanding, and the hope for pleasant night's sleep.
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